Lavender, Travel Stamps and a Potjie: Part 2

So although I have not yet visited the lavender fields of Provence, we have done quite a bit of travel. After a late start (I was 29 before I travelled outside SA for the first time) we have since travelled from Greenland to India, Cuba to Thailand, Canada to Egypt and a few more. We have immersed ourselves in cultures, preferring to get to know the locals, returning home richer for the experience.

Swedish bicycle

When my daughter was born it seemed like the most natural thing to carry on in spite of the prophets of doom who would have us believe that having children meant it was time to hang up the travel boots. She was nine months old when we took her to Mauritius and not quite three when she accompanied us on a 2-month long visit to India and Nepal. She travelled like a pro, charmed the locals and was the only one not to get sick. She was comfortable sleeping and eating anywhere although she did refuse to use any “squatting toilets”. The bladder strength she built has stood her in good stead for later travel.

Italian bicycle

By the time her brother was born we thought we had the travel thing down pat. He proved to be more of a challenge, though as he was more resistant to change and disruptions to his routine. Once we established that he needed rest days in between and that he needed to know exactly how many days we would be away and what we would be doing on those days, he was fine. It took until age seven though before he shocked us by asking if we could go back to Florence if we missed the plane home from Milan. Italy has remained a favourite.

Thai bicycle

We subscribe to Mark Twain’s assertion that travel is fatal to narrow-mindedness and bigotry. So we have only ourselves to blame that our daughter, aged 17, has not only spent two months in Toronto , Canada, on exchange but has also just returned from a remote, hill-tribe village in Thailand where she has been helping to build a water storage tank. In both countries she has immersed herself locally and though she has missed home, has had a ball of a time. Each time she returned, I noticed how she has grown up and become more independent. I have little doubt that she will fly the nest soon. And we are proud of having given her the wings. 

Love across the Line

Last night my son and I rented the movie Our Family Wedding - a story about a cross-cultural wedding and the difficulties the bridal couple endure. I didn’t expect it to be a good movie (it wasn't) but was curious to see Ugly Betty’s America Ferreira and maybe have a bit of a laugh.

It was interesting to see the levels of racism portrayed in the movie. It's the same issues which have been highlighted in many movies like My Big Fat Greek Wedding, and many others which portray love across the “line”. But this movie was quite explicit about the differences between the families, and even the workmen were making fun of the wedding between "Mexicanos" and "Negritos". It's one thing when the two families hold onto their traditions so fiercely that life becomes difficult for the bridal couple but quite another when a whole community is against the wedding. I know it's hardly the definitive word on the state of racism in the US but I believe that it's a close reflection of reality. It's certainly an issue here in South Africa.

I have written about racism in a previous blog but it is a topic I will probably keep coming back to as I battle to make sense of where we come from. I believe that we are not born racist. But we have this instinct to hold onto what is familiar and to protect our traditions to a level where we exclude others. It is such a limiting standpoint. We close ourselves off to new experiences and viewpoints that can only enrich our lives.

I had a very interesting chat to a woman at dinner the other night – she is Swiss-German, her husband Italian and they are living here temporarily. For a while French was their common language until they had children and then decided that they should speak Italian. The children went on to be educated in the UK. The daughter married a Brazilian who she met while working on a project in India. They now live in Australia. The son who was living in the US, not to be outdone by his sister, has a partner of Japanese and American origin and they live in Spain. I think I got that all right!

I find the lack of borders and artificial boundaries wonderful. The family is truly international. They have travelled and worked in different countries and been exposed to diverse people and cultures. They have rich experiences and I am sure that there has to be tolerance and respect for it to work. I am rubbing my hands in glee waiting to see how the grandchildren turn out!

Like Mark Twain said, travel is fatal to bigotry, prejudice and narrow-mindedness. But we don’t need to go far. We can travel to our neighbours and communities, read, watch movies and be open to different experiences. It comes down to respecting each other, embracing differences and understanding that our way is not the only way.