Building Cathedrals

This morning I had to remind myself that I was “building cathedrals”. My son has been involved with the school music concert which was held in the City Hall over the last two nights. Including the rehearsal the night before, he has had three long days and late nights. This morning it was a tough job getting him up and off to school – grumpiness all around. Talking to him, I felt like I was on one of those overseas calls where there is a time delay on the response. He seemed to be moving in slow motion.

“Nice mom” was being understanding and trying to make it easy on him by helping to get ready, grabbing the hockey kit, and all but attempting to carry him to the car (yeah, right!). But “bad mom” was thinking that half the school was probably feeling the same and he should just get up and go already! There it is again, trying to find the balance between nurturing and kicking out of the nest, so that they can fly.

But to come back to the cathedrals: a while ago there was an email doing the rounds which compared being a mother to the cathedral-builders of long ago. These people toiled for many years, sometimes working on cathedrals which would only be completed long after they had died. But the attention to detail and the craftsmanship was of a very high standard. Nobody may remember the names of those who did the work, but they laid the foundations for great buildings in the same way that mothers quietly lay the foundations for great lives.

So with Women’s Day coming up, here’s a salute to all the mothers out there. When the going gets tough, think of all the “cathedrals” you are building.  

Happy Women's Day

This morning I attended a Women's Day brunch to raise funds for St Luke's Hospice. The keynote speaker delivered an interesting talk from a very different angle - Does the public attention of celebrities with cancer help with cancer awareness? She mentioned many actors, First Wives, singers and captains of industry, who have been diagnosed in recent years with different types of cancer. She could not really answer the question but left us with the message that the real heroes are the ordinary people - the people who you and I know - who battle the disease.

Both my maternal grandparents died of cancer, my grandmother of lung cancer and my grandfather of prostrate cancer which had spread to the bowel. My grandmother spent her last days at the hospice and both my parents have been volunteers there. In recent years several of my friends have been affected directly or indirectly by the disease, mostly with breast cancer. I think that the camaraderie of our circle of friends has helped enormously -  helping with kids, cooking a meal, company during chemotherapy sessions, just being there for a cup of tea and a chat, laughing about choosing a wig or helping to find different ways to tie a scarf.

But at the end of the day, I think that it has come down to them walking that journey by themselves, drawing on inner strength and faith. I can well understand the war terms used to talk about the disease - doing battle, surviving, attacking, long struggles. They have all survived, rising up to the challenge and emerging as stronger women. On this Women's Day, I would like to salute each and everyone of them, those who are in my circle and beyond.